Is your relationship about to end? Does the grass look greener on the other side of the fence? Are you disappointed because your relationship isn’t what you expected it to be? Do you think other relationships don’t experience boredom, loneliness, cheating, or lack of sex?

Do you believe in a perfect marriage? Do you think your partner can make you happy? Are you thinking about leaving your relationship? Are you having thoughts of divorce?

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Do you find yourself thinking “Is this all there is?” Is the sense of spontaneity and spark missing in your relationship? Are you resentful towards your partner? Do you feel like you are drowning?

This is disillusionment and this type of disillusionment in a relationship is normal. It is part of the cycle of romance, disillusionment, and joy.

The level of happiness doesn’t change once you commit to each other. Problems won’t magically disappear. Make a decision to love and move beyond the feelings of disappointment or resentment is a major key in having a long lasting happy relationship.

Paths to Disappointment and Unhappiness

False expectations, thinking someone else can make you happy, trying to read one another’s mind, wanting to do everything together, losing your self, and wanting to have a perfect relationship are direct paths to disappointment and unhappiness.

Ways to Get Out of Disillusionment

• Put yourself at the top of your to do list.

• Make a decision to love.

• Discuss one another’s expectations about your relationship.

• Ask for what you want.

• Accept your relationship isn’t perfect.

• Hug and kiss your partner often.

• Don’t let anger take over.

• Find out what’s going on in your own life.

• Don’t be manipulative or allow yourself to be manipulated.

What happens when the above suggestions don’t work? It may be time to think about leaving your relationship.

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